Another One For Your Eyeballs To Enjoy

The Markdown on Art

Okay. So as a reader and a writer...I like books. I go to the library often and bookstores are like my home away from home. There is nothing I love more than prying open the pages of a brand new hard cover novel in the fantasy section of my local Barnes & Noble. The scent of a fresh book is intoxicating to me. A book could be total rubbish and I'd still open it to sniff the pages for several minutes. During these instances, I imagine that passersby see me and wonder if I'm lining up and snorting cocaine from the inside of the spine. If I did cocaine...that'd be a good way to do it...

Anyway...despite my love of books...buying them is hard. I don't usually have money and when I do it has to go on other, less enjoyable stuff. Thats why I found myself having mixed emotions when I found a particular book at the store I was in. The book was “Stick To Drawing Comics, Monkey Brain!” By Scott Adams. For those of you who don't know, Scott Adams is the genius behind the Dilbert comics you can find in almost any newspaper. I love Dilbert, I've read other books my Mr. Adams, like The Dilbert Principle. His work is always awesome. This book that I found was no exception.

The book is witty, intelligent, and makes you laugh with every page. I was very happy that I had found it and am still happy to have it...but I feel sort of guilty for acquiring it where I did...and for how much it cost me. I picked this book up at my local Dollar Tree. Yes...it was just one dollar.

When I saw the book on the shelf I said to myself “Shit yeah! Good deal!” So yes I did buy it. But...let me explain something....the other books of Scott Adams have made the New York Times Best Seller list several times each, and he's earned a lot of fame, respect, and a lot of money from them. And yet this book winds up in the bin in the Dollar Tree simply because it's a book of anecdotes and personal thoughts as opposed to his other works, which deal more with real life economics and business.

Does that difference really mean that Adams put less work into this book? Did he pour less of his heart and soul into its pages than the others? Was he ashamed of it when he was finished? I truly don't think so. This book was, as far as I know, just as much of a beloved brainchild to Adams as any other thing he's done, so as a writer myself, I think I would be a little offended to find MY book sitting in a bin for a dollar.

And you know what? It's not so much the price of one dollar that bothers me...well it does...but its not the main factor to me. Its more of the fact that I bought it at a DOLLAR TREE. Where everything is a dollar. EVERYTHING. So basically what society is saying is that Mr. Adams' book is worth precisely the same amount as that little frog pen near the register thats wearing boxing gloves with buttons on the back that can make him punch (I have two of these...) I'd be truly mad. You wanna mark someone's passion and hard work down to a mere dollar? Put it in the dollar bin at Barne's for fuck's sake. At least give it SOME credit! Its a good book! This book, also, was crammed in with a shitload of self-help books, numerous copies of the Holy Bible and shitty fantasy novels that read like a copy of Clifford the Big Red Dog. Seriously? Scott adams doesn't deserve that. His book, unlike all else on the shelf, is not fiction (Oooooo he just called the Bible fiction. He's going to hell!)

I realize....that this book was published in 2007. Four years ago. The book, admittedly might have run it's course by now, may have gotten as popular as it was going to, then declined. But still...fucking DOLLAR TREE? I mean they might as well rename that store to “Hick-E-Mart” (get it?) Like the majority of the people who use these stores will ever appreciate the writing of Scott Adams (or even be able to read words containing more than two syllables.) So his work is not only insulted by being put into a shitty redneck store, it's further bashed by either being ignored by 90% of the consumer base of Dollar Tree, or being purchased by bumbling, banjo twanging cousin-humpers who are more likely to wipe their asses with the pages than read them. I like to think I'm one of the only people, if not the ONLY person with more than one braincell who bought this book and READ it.

The ironic part is....from what I've read about Mr. Adams, and all I've learned about his thought processes from reading Stick to Drawing Comics, Monkey Brain...I don't think Scott Adams gives a flying fuck that his book is at the dollar tree. He's made enough money off of his career that one book won't make much difference. I could be wrong, and he could be outraged by this fact, but as far as I know, I'm the one who's ticked off by a situation I consider to be defamation of character. It's okay. Scott if you happen to see this, please go ahead and continue wiping your ass with twenty dollar bills. I'm totally cool with that, and I'll continue being a grumbling fan.

End rant.